Comments on: Cool 2 B Real http://www.daringyoungmom.com/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/ On Her Flying Trapeze - Blog of Seattle-Area Mom, Kathryn Young Thompson Sat, 31 Dec 2011 21:14:33 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: nottoopensive http://www.daringyoungmom.com/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/comment-page-1/#comment-31409 nottoopensive Thu, 26 Apr 2007 00:20:15 +0000 http://www.daringyoungmom.com/wp/index.php/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/#comment-31409 Actually, on a google search, you're pretty much the ONLY result for "beef and tweens"! http://www.google.com/search?client=safari&rls=en&q=%22beef+and+tweens%22&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8 Actually, on a google search, you’re pretty much the ONLY result for “beef and tweens”!

http://www.google.com/search?client=safari&rls=en&q=%22beef+and+tweens%22&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8

]]> By: Michelle http://www.daringyoungmom.com/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/comment-page-1/#comment-3877 Michelle Tue, 25 Apr 2006 03:46:00 +0000 http://www.daringyoungmom.com/wp/index.php/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/#comment-3877 My absolute favorite book on writing, <I>Writing Down the Bones</I> by Natalie Goldberg, has a chapter about writing statements and answering questions. Natalie describes the results of a study done in the seventies showing that women and minorities were more likely to add qualifiers ("...isn't it?" "...don't you think?") and indefinite modifiers ("maybe" "for some reason") to their statements. She talks about making clear, assertive statements to strengthen one's writing. For example, "It was terrible" instead of, "It was pretty terrible, wasn't it?" Seems to me this sort of confidence would strengthen all sorts of communication. My absolute favorite book on writing, Writing Down the Bones by Natalie Goldberg, has a chapter about writing statements and answering questions. Natalie describes the results of a study done in the seventies showing that women and minorities were more likely to add qualifiers (“…isn’t it?” “…don’t you think?”) and indefinite modifiers (“maybe” “for some reason”) to their statements.

She talks about making clear, assertive statements to strengthen one’s writing. For example, “It was terrible” instead of, “It was pretty terrible, wasn’t it?” Seems to me this sort of confidence would strengthen all sorts of communication.

]]> By: Bobita http://www.daringyoungmom.com/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/comment-page-1/#comment-3876 Bobita Sat, 22 Apr 2006 21:06:00 +0000 http://www.daringyoungmom.com/wp/index.php/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/#comment-3876 Seriously, this is a fantastic post. Blogsphere listens to you, Daring one! And you are challenging us and calling us to honesty. My thanks to you. Seriously, this is a fantastic post. Blogsphere listens to you, Daring one! And you are challenging us and calling us to honesty. My thanks to you.

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.daringyoungmom.com/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/comment-page-1/#comment-3875 Anonymous Thu, 20 Apr 2006 20:31:00 +0000 http://www.daringyoungmom.com/wp/index.php/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/#comment-3875 Check out this website for new tools regarding emotional insight, development and wisdom: www.emotionsinc.org Check out this website for new tools regarding emotional insight, development and wisdom:
http://www.emotionsinc.org

]]> By: Heather http://www.daringyoungmom.com/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/comment-page-1/#comment-3874 Heather Thu, 20 Apr 2006 16:15:00 +0000 http://www.daringyoungmom.com/wp/index.php/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/#comment-3874 Ha ha ha. I too struggled with the first few weeks, then the first few months of motherhood. As a remedy for bored and stressed feelings (and an answer for WTF to DO all day), my friend and I started the Rookie Moms website. The great irony is that by being totally honest and trying to come up with different activities and fun stuff to try, we wound up making early motherhood itself look like lots of "fun" to the outside observer. Hopefully, it feels real to the folks going through it! Ha ha ha. I too struggled with the first few weeks, then the first few months of motherhood.

As a remedy for bored and stressed feelings (and an answer for WTF to DO all day), my friend and I started the Rookie Moms website.

The great irony is that by being totally honest and trying to come up with different activities and fun stuff to try, we wound up making early motherhood itself look like lots of “fun” to the outside observer. Hopefully, it feels real to the folks going through it!

]]> By: kyouell http://www.daringyoungmom.com/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/comment-page-1/#comment-3873 kyouell Thu, 20 Apr 2006 07:50:00 +0000 http://www.daringyoungmom.com/wp/index.php/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/#comment-3873 I'm with Krista. My 10-month-old son has Down syndrome and I'm very conscious that he is going to experience some things quite differently from me. I guess that it's been in the front of my mind, maybe more than other moms, to make sure I'm not telling him how he feels. My mom on the other hand! Sheesh. She is one of those people who has always known what is best for everyone. Last week my son had surgery to correct his heart defect. We had an "incident" between my hubby and mom, and I finally had to bite the bullet and talk to her about it. I tried very hard to not tell her that she was wrong and be all accusatory, but instead to tell her how her actions made us feel. Her comments included, "That's just dumb," and "That's just silly." Not one apology. I did notice on a later visit that she caught herself when she was just going to go ahead and do what she thought was right even though I was handling the situation another way. It can be very invalidating. Especially when so many other people are giving us kudos on how well we are taking care of him. She'll even agree with others, but then her actions... I don't know. I guess I offer this up as a warning. It can be really important to let others feel, no matter their age. This isn't something you can stop doing when the kids grow up. I’m with Krista. My 10-month-old son has Down syndrome and I’m very conscious that he is going to experience some things quite differently from me. I guess that it’s been in the front of my mind, maybe more than other moms, to make sure I’m not telling him how he feels. My mom on the other hand! Sheesh. She is one of those people who has always known what is best for everyone. Last week my son had surgery to correct his heart defect. We had an “incident” between my hubby and mom, and I finally had to bite the bullet and talk to her about it. I tried very hard to not tell her that she was wrong and be all accusatory, but instead to tell her how her actions made us feel. Her comments included, “That’s just dumb,” and “That’s just silly.” Not one apology. I did notice on a later visit that she caught herself when she was just going to go ahead and do what she thought was right even though I was handling the situation another way. It can be very invalidating. Especially when so many other people are giving us kudos on how well we are taking care of him. She’ll even agree with others, but then her actions… I don’t know. I guess I offer this up as a warning. It can be really important to let others feel, no matter their age. This isn’t something you can stop doing when the kids grow up.

]]> By: April1930s http://www.daringyoungmom.com/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/comment-page-1/#comment-3872 April1930s Thu, 20 Apr 2006 05:53:00 +0000 http://www.daringyoungmom.com/wp/index.php/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/#comment-3872 Thanks for posting this... I will definitely be on my own lookout for letting my children "feel" as they do and not what I necessarily want them to feel. This was a good check for me! :) P.S. As far as sleepless nights go for newborn moms - I HIIIIIIIIIGHLY recommend Babywise or Along the Infant Way (Christian version of Babywise). It literally saved my sleepless life and gave me hope. Thanks for posting this… I will definitely be on my own lookout for letting my children “feel” as they do and not what I necessarily want them to feel. This was a good check for me! :) P.S. As far as sleepless nights go for newborn moms – I HIIIIIIIIIGHLY recommend Babywise or Along the Infant Way (Christian version of Babywise). It literally saved my sleepless life and gave me hope.

]]> By: Gabriela http://www.daringyoungmom.com/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/comment-page-1/#comment-3871 Gabriela Thu, 20 Apr 2006 03:21:00 +0000 http://www.daringyoungmom.com/wp/index.php/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/#comment-3871 So true. I have had several friendships that have gone from surface to real friendship when we finally shared some of our real feelings. Sometimes you just need to hear, "I know how you feel." So true. I have had several friendships that have gone from surface to real friendship when we finally shared some of our real feelings. Sometimes you just need to hear, “I know how you feel.”

]]> By: Peach http://www.daringyoungmom.com/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/comment-page-1/#comment-3870 Peach Thu, 20 Apr 2006 02:25:00 +0000 http://www.daringyoungmom.com/wp/index.php/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/#comment-3870 Kathryn, thank you for your vulnerability and willingness to encourage that in the rest of us. We all have a need to acknowledge how we're "really" feeling with someone. Kathryn, thank you for your vulnerability and willingness to encourage that in the rest of us. We all have a need to acknowledge how we’re “really” feeling with someone.

]]> By: HLH http://www.daringyoungmom.com/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/comment-page-1/#comment-3869 HLH Thu, 20 Apr 2006 00:02:00 +0000 http://www.daringyoungmom.com/wp/index.php/2006/04/18/cool-2-b-real/#comment-3869 Yup, it is important to validate your own and otehrs feelings. It doesn't matter whether the feelings are justified, right, wrong acceptable whatever- the fact is- someone is feeling it, you must validate that they really feel whatever emotion exsists. Hope that made sense. Yup, it is important to validate your own and otehrs feelings. It doesn’t matter whether the feelings are justified, right, wrong acceptable whatever- the fact is- someone is feeling it, you must validate that they really feel whatever emotion exsists.

Hope that made sense.

]]>