Today I Was a Mom
I was a mom pretty much all day today. Here is my report:
I cruelly forced someone to wear pants outside in 40-degree weather.
I cut peanut-butter sandwiches in the shape of dinosaurs and delivered them to an alfresco restaurant-for-2 at the end of our driveway.
I danced like a lunatic while driving in my car. My passengers said I was good. I chose to believe them.
I changed shirts twice but never showered.
I calmly explained AGAIN why people under the age of 30 should never use permanent markers… ever.
I threw away 3 packs of wipes that had been left open and dried out completely. Yes. I heard the earth and Sheryl Crow scream out in pain and betrayal.
I received a visitor while sitting upon the throne who proceeded to hug and cuddle me tenderly while I peed… just because of love.
When they asked “Why,” I answered. All day long.
I held a large child like a baby while he cried and showed me his bonk. Twice.
I giggled on the escalator while holding hands with a boy and agreed that it was “JUST LIKE A RIDE!”
I tried to play a girly ballad on the car stereo but was told, “That song’s scary!” “No it’s not,” I retorted. He responded, “It’s not scary to YOU, but it’s scary to ME.” I navigated my Zune back to Eye of the Tiger.
I sat out on the front porch to sort the mail so they could keep playing outside until it was All the Way Dark.
When asked to squeeze the ketchup in the shape of a dinosaur, I did my best but was informed that it looked more like an AT-AT.
I purchased the socks with the grey bottoms even though they cost 50 cents more because they help him run so much faster.
After 3 hours of hard work, I unearthed a parking spot in our garage and put my car in it, only to be scared and confused when I went to leave for a meeting and found that the car was “missing” from the driveway.
I sat in a meeting full of other moms, animatedly discussing ways of extorting money from friends and family to support education. An award called a “Golden Acorn,” professional jump-ropers, and nominating people to be on a committee to nominate people were all discussed at the meeting as well.
I picked up two slugs with my bare hands and threw them to freedom so the children’s squealing would stop. One was on a rubber ball. One was on my living room carpet. They felt like congealed slime… because they were.
Upon request I composed two original songs, one called, “Hooky Joojie” and the other called, “Mommy, the Laylee’s Mommy,” sung to the tune of Rudolf the Red-nosed Reindeer.
I heard two people pray about how much they loved me.
Today I was a mom. It’s not a bad gig.
Inessa Says:
You do your job very well, i give you a raise and bonus!
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qwendolyn Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 2:03 pm
Lol! you rock!
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tracy Reply:
January 26th, 2009 at 9:33 pm
yes, yes. yes. you have covered just about everything. laughing on missouri.
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Shauna Reply:
January 19th, 2010 at 9:52 pm
I am a mother of four, and nearing the end of the ‘active’ parenting phase of my ‘gig’. I laughed and smiled. Thank you so much!
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 12:52 am
cyndi Says:
That may be about the best post I’ve read, maybe ever! It is a great gig, and thank you for reminding me to remember that
So, does he like the socks with the multi-colored bottoms? Mine swear by their speedpower! Happy momming, and thanx for sharing!
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The Daring One Reply:
January 14th, 2009 at 9:52 am
He prefers the colored bottoms but they were out of stock. Grey is almost a color…
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 6:24 am
Faith Says:
This post was really great, greater, I think, than your usual great posts. Being Mommy is certainly an adventure!
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The Daring One Reply:
January 14th, 2009 at 9:52 am
Thanks Faith. It was a good day.
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 6:43 am
sarah k. Says:
I’m having heart palpitations over the tossed wipes. Kathryn! You live in Seattle! Don’t they know how to save dried out wipes there? GET THEM WET AGAIN! As in, with the same stuff that dried out of them. Put them in a sandwich tupperware, add water, voila! Did you know you can even wash the dang things in your regular laundry and reuse them at least a couple of times? Think of all the space in the landfill saved by just a few threads of polyester.
There, I feel a little better. Except I now need to go throw up at the thought of touching slugs with bare skin, and no spatulas.
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The Daring One Reply:
January 14th, 2009 at 9:51 am
I should have added you to the list of people screaming. I rescued 2 of the packs out of the garbage in your honour.
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sarah k. Reply:
January 14th, 2009 at 11:19 am
Oh phew! But I never screamed, I just swooned. But now I feel immensely better.
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 7:12 am
aimee Says:
Whew!
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 7:56 am
Keyona Says:
Awsome! The life of a mom is PRICELESS!
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 9:08 am
Awesome Mom Says:
Slugs with bare hands? Eeeeewwww! That is one thing that I really would think twice before doing even for my beloved children.
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 9:15 am
Janel Says:
Thank you for including conversing on the throne in your list of motherhood responsibilities. It’s so true! Very sweet.
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 9:39 am
Amber Snair Says:
I love when your blog makes me laugh out loud like a crazy person at work
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 9:42 am
Holly Says:
Not only were you a mom, you were a great mom. Well done.
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 9:55 am
grammyelin Says:
It’s a GREAT gig! So glad I got to share it with you.
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 9:57 am
Rebecca Says:
I love this. Isn’t it nice to be good at your job?
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 10:42 am
Debra Says:
Kathryn -
Why you don’t have a best seller sitting on the shelves at Borders is confusing to me.
Seriously.
And I’m not “just saying that” because I’m only one tank full of gas away from stalking you once you’re famous.
You are an incredibly gifted writer + a fantastic mom.
Debra
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The Daring One Reply:
January 14th, 2009 at 11:41 pm
I’m working on it. Truly. It’s not even a mom book but I’m plugging away a little at a time and when it comes out, you can totally stalk me to lunch.
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 11:49 am
michal Says:
i loved this post. way to relish the day!
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 3:13 pm
Jen @ The Short Years Says:
I can relate to just about every single thing in this post. Great way to explain to people who wonder what at-home moms do all day! Oh, and the slug thing? You are so much braver than I am. When I found a slug inside the other day, I had to pick it up using a giant mass of paper towels as a buffer so no bare skin would touch the slime. You are truly the DARING young mom and if I had a hat, it would be off to you.
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 3:51 pm
BooMama » Linky Interwebby Awesomeness 01.14.09 Says:
[...] I got a little weepy when I read “Today I Was A Mom” by Kathryn at Daring Young [...]
Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 4:26 pm
MamaHen Says:
loved it!
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 4:41 pm
Bella Says:
It’s a great job, isn’t it? You’re awesome.
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 5:05 pm
Tara Says:
Beautiful, just beautiful. And so true. Thank you!
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 5:18 pm
Steph @ Diapers and Divinity Says:
You give moms a good name. Thanks!
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 5:21 pm
Mrs. Nurse Boy Says:
EXCELLENT post!!! Thanks for sharing!
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 5:59 pm
Thea @ I'm a Drama Mama Says:
Thiis post wore me out just reading it!
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 6:51 pm
Amanda Says:
I hope you don’t mind. I linked your post to our MOPS (Mother’s of Preschoolers) blog…I’ll probably read it at the next meeting. Thanks for sharing your gig with the rest of us…
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The Daring One Reply:
January 14th, 2009 at 11:39 pm
That’s really kind. Thank you so much. I was hoping it would sound familiar to a lot of you out there. Except for the not showering part. I wish you all much better hygiene than that.
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 8:44 pm
Hope @ Monkey Giggles Says:
You were THE mama…the best
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 8:44 pm
Ann Kroeker Says:
I made a pumpkin pie and the 7yo boy who loves pumpkin pie more than any other dessert in the whole world came up and gave me a hug about three hours before dinner and hugged me, looked up and said, “That’s because you made me pumpkin pie. And I love you.”
That’s all for me today. I was a mom, but not as awesome a mom as you, that’s for sure. You really gave. And gave. And gave.
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The Daring One Reply:
January 14th, 2009 at 11:39 pm
Why do you think I chose this mom-day to blog? If you think every day is like this, I’ve seriously misrepresented myself. It was a good one.
Love the pumpkin pie story. Anyone who can raise a 7-year-old boy to be that sweet is doing something RIGHT!
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 9:31 pm
Becca @ the Stanley Clan Says:
Oh I love this so much! Being a mom is the best, even when it’s hard right?!
thanks for sharing today!
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 10:24 pm
Jenn Says:
I agree with the mom who asked why you’re not already on The View talking about your latest novel, the one where you explain how to make up lyrics to Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, for ALL the holidays – and then some.
When are you letting me photograph you?
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The Daring One Reply:
January 14th, 2009 at 11:37 pm
When this third eye shrinks from off my face. Seriously I have not broken out this bad since I was 15. Soon, I hope. I saw your gorgeous work up at the gym and I recognized it from across the room.
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Posted on January 14th, 2009 at 11:04 pm
Amy @ Experience Imagination Says:
I was a mom at 3:00 in the morning and … well, your day sounds like a lot more fun than my middle-of-the-night adventure!
It’s nice to know I’m not the only one who manages to change clothes without showering once in a while.
And the bathroom thing–around here, upon being told bathroom activities deserve privacy, my daughter starts a whole new round of the “But, why???” game.
Sometimes, I just give up and tell her I’ve run out of answers and she’ll have to check back tomorrow to see if I’ve been restocked.
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 12:05 am
KYouell Says:
I’m glad I’m not the only one who gets hugs of love on the throne. My husband thinks I’m weird to let her hug me then, but the happiness on her face is too much to reject. I think maybe she’s so happy because she knows I’m trapped.
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 12:39 am
Swank Girl Says:
I’ve never been to your blog before – I was linked up through Boomama’s blog… and I’m so glad I did. I loved this post. I don’t have children yet… hubby and I are waiting for a little longer… but I so appreciated your words. This motherhood gig does sound pretty amazing and rewarding and I am looking forward to it very longingly. Thank you for sharing with us.
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 6:38 am
Paige Says:
Yep, you nailed it.
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 7:16 am
David Says:
I just read this to my wife, who is a “daring young mother” of two little boys and I was the one who was crying at the end.
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 7:33 am
Marla Taviano Says:
Beautiful. Love it.
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 7:53 am
TheChickadeefeeder Says:
YOU ARE A GREAT MOM!
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 8:26 am
lucy Says:
Wow, I’m exhausted from your post but had to laugh about the cuddling during your pee break…I don’t know how many times my daughter just walks in when I’m doing my business to ask me questions, tell me something or ask me to help her look for something…lol
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 9:45 am
Stacy (mama-om) Says:
I agree. A very great post, even amid all your very great ones!
Good job, Mom.
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 9:48 am
Christine Says:
well said! What a great post!
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 11:54 am
RLR Says:
Just love this, and I’m sharing it with my friends via a link from my blog. I’ll be back
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 12:27 pm
Kristen Harris Says:
Oh I love it!…SO MUCH! I can relate to all of it, except the slugs. I don’t do slugs but I will squash a bug with my ultra thick charmin:)
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 12:50 pm
kelli Says:
I was with you till the slugs. That makes me scream way more than throwing out the wipes. {i do that too… sshhh}
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 2:14 pm
Wanda Says:
M A M A ‘ S R O C K !!!
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 2:44 pm
angela michelle Says:
Love it! All the fun little things that make up our big job!
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 4:25 pm
coach jamie Says:
I love it!! Your post has reminded me to take time to enjoy all of the simple “mom” experinences that happen in a day and to remember how important it is to be present in the moment for your children.
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 5:48 pm
“Today I was a mom” « Ashleigh’s Blog Says:
[...] a mom” January 16, 2009 Filed under: Uncategorized — ashleighcarroll @ 2:41 am This just about sums up my normal days. [...]
Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 7:41 pm
Giana Says:
I absolutely LOVED this!!! Let me tell you, we’ve all been there with the bathroom thing. A lot of the time my 17month old all but insists on sitting on my lap while I’m in there. My husband won’t let him into the bathroom when he’s in there and the poor boy will lay outside the door crying!! And kudos on the slugs, this mommy would need rubber gloves and paper towels before I even thought about touching a slug! ICK!
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 8:14 pm
LaUnika Says:
Amazing post. On almost every single line I said “I’ve done that”.
Keep up the good work.
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 8:59 pm
Kristi Says:
Now that was a great post!
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Posted on January 15th, 2009 at 10:32 pm
Linda Pare Says:
This is so loving and touching. Kids grow up in a blink of an eye. Cherish it all.
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Posted on January 16th, 2009 at 5:25 am
Jamie Says:
WHAT?! You made your child wear pants?! That is the ultimate punishment for a 5yo princess… I have heart palpitations every time I have to tell her to change b/c it’s 50 degrees below zero in Michigan and she wants to run errands with daddy. As for sharing toilet time, I can occasionally be seen (only by members of my family) sitting on the throne with a child or two, or maybe just one, on my lap just for the sake of peace.
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Posted on January 16th, 2009 at 7:30 am
Melissa Says:
Loved your blog. It made me laugh and reminded me of one of my days. I just wish you hadn’t thrown away baby wipes. You can rewet them and use or just dust with them. I rewet and wipe down woodwork,shoes car interior, etc….
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Posted on January 16th, 2009 at 8:10 am
DeNae Says:
See, you get it. If I could be reincarnated I’d come back as you. Although I suppose that would leave YOU in a pickle. If I’m you, then I suppose you’d have to be me. That’s not all bad, of course, but I’m much older than you are and I would probably set the ball on fire before ever touching the slug attached to it. If the slug were in my living room, we’d just have to move.
So, if you’d prefer to be a middle-aged BTDT (been there, done that) mom, let me know and I’ll look into the cosmic implications of switching places.
I bet there are a bunch of forms to fill out. (And what would we use for ID? Hmmm…)
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Posted on January 16th, 2009 at 2:11 pm
Joel Says:
Wonderful
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Posted on January 16th, 2009 at 2:23 pm
texasholly @ June Cleaver Nirvana Says:
I loved this.
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Posted on January 17th, 2009 at 10:08 am
The Lazy Organizer Says:
It’s got to be a scary thing to lose your car in your own garage (that made me laugh the loudest) and I’m so glad Sarah broke the news about the wipes so I didn’t have to.
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Posted on January 17th, 2009 at 11:26 pm
Carol F Says:
This post makes me proud to be a mom. Thank you!
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Posted on January 18th, 2009 at 9:55 am
Dianne Says:
What a poignant post. Excellent reminder to moms everywhere.
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Posted on January 18th, 2009 at 6:13 pm
Rocks In My Dryer Says:
Kathryn, this was beautiful.
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Posted on January 19th, 2009 at 1:35 pm
amanda Says:
thank you,so funny so true and touching reminds me of my days . dont you just love this job?
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Posted on January 19th, 2009 at 4:37 pm
Basanta Says:
Great post!
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Posted on January 19th, 2009 at 11:31 pm
bee Says:
Love this post!
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Posted on January 20th, 2009 at 7:56 am
Stumbled. « And what? Says:
[...] Stumbled. I don’t know how I came across this blog, but I love this post from “Daring Young Mom” [...]
Posted on January 20th, 2009 at 6:44 pm
Brian Flatow Says:
Nice job, Mom!
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Posted on January 21st, 2009 at 6:50 pm
kittyhox Says:
Aw, why do you always have to make me tear up right at the end.
It reminds me that I’m the luckiest person in the world because I get to spend all day every day with my son. The funny moments and affection are worth all the tantrums, lack of privacy, and messes.
My son also like to follow me into the little potty room inside our bathroom and either give me hugs or turn off the lights and shut the door so we’re in total darkness, because we’re “hiding.” I figure it’s good practice in case there is ever a burglar.
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Posted on January 23rd, 2009 at 3:19 pm
Overwhelmed Says:
Perfect! I love it!
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Posted on January 25th, 2009 at 11:03 pm
DianaGainer Says:
It’s a great job, ain’t it? And to think at moments I occasionally thought about resigning! I couldn’t seem to get no replacements though, I’m glad to report. Did you ever pause to reflect on why, at two years, they suddenly insisted on kissing their own boo-boos? Did that even make sense? Did you ever have any spectacular misunderstandings with the doctor, like carting two hysterically screaming boobelehs in to find out why they cried 22 hours of the day, to have him insist that you make them stop crying so’s he could talk to you? Or did your child come home from school and tell you he learned that the reason they call it the Blue Bonnet Plague is ’cause it made folks break out in a blue rash on their noggins the shape of a bonnet? Yeah, I guess that was me and mine! Gotta laugh! They do grow up though. Then we miss those days.
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Posted on January 28th, 2009 at 7:49 am
Elizabeth Says:
Wow! that’s an awesome post! Nevermind that you make my mothering skills look like the underdog of the year’s! I’m definitely visiting your blog again : )
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The Daring One Reply:
February 11th, 2009 at 10:26 am
That’s why the title was “TODAY” I was a mom. Every day is not like that. This was one day when I felt like I really got it done. I won’t write about what I did yesterday… Thanks for stopping by.
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Posted on February 11th, 2009 at 10:16 am
Keri Says:
Just stumbled across this post – thanks for sharing. Some days are easier than others, and sounds like you had a great day here. Thanks for helping us all to keep it in focus.
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Posted on February 12th, 2009 at 12:10 pm
kathy Says:
First off, great writing talent!!!!
Second, thank you. I have four kids. Single mom. Some days I wonder what I have accomplished, and usually come up with = ??? nada. Your essay made me review my day. Holy cow, it is amazing that I even got a load of laundry done. What, with bugs and boo-boos and potty parties! You made me think about how important those little things are……
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Posted on May 27th, 2009 at 7:36 pm
Family Matters Says:
I’m all choked up. That’s pretty much how my good parenting days go, except I only have one left to do these sorts of things with. The other two are too grown up, save moments of temporary insanity.
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Posted on August 12th, 2009 at 2:33 am
Marion Says:
I sat here reading and laughing the whole time. I was relating to everything, especially the kissing of bonks, and the visits whilst on the throne. Thank you!!
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Posted on November 12th, 2009 at 1:01 pm
sarah Says:
i love this! i go through these same situations everyday, times 3, and thank the gods for every moment!
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Posted on December 16th, 2009 at 11:23 pm