Drops of Thank You

Thank you so much to everyone who read and shared my post from two weeks ago with your family and friends, maybe enemies whose attitudes you were hoping to change. The number of people who have shared their kind words and stories with me is such a throat lump, I’m not quite sure what to say.

Many of you shared very raw and personal stories and I’ve been moved to tears daily as I’ve read your comments and emails. I’m not a huge crier. Okay. I cried at the Backstreet Boys Concert. And pretty much every time I’ve ever seen a flash mob on YouTube. And because… ballerinas. But I rarely cry over blog comments.

When I first had the Drops of Awesome flash of inspiration, I desperately needed it. I was having one of the “dark times.”

As you know if you’ve read this blog for long, and most of you haven’t, (WELCOME!) I dealt with some pretty crushing panic and anxiety disorder following the birth of my second child seven years ago. It was humbling in a way I hadn’t imagined possible. To suddenly not be able to trust your own thoughts and feelings is terrifying. I’ve found some amazing help and healing but I still deal with it off and on. It’s something I may struggle with for the rest of my life.

And that’s okay.

I’ve been tested to my limit no more or less than I’m sure you have been tested to your personal limit. We grow. We gain more empathy. I know Christ didn’t learn love and empathy by spending his days in a bubble surrounded by fluffy bunnies and marshmallow peeps. He felt and experienced pain on an incomprehensible level.

So when this flash of inspiration came, I was grateful for it. It got me through a really hard time. When I felt inspired to share it with the teenagers at church, it was for them. I felt that and it was reaffirmed when one of the girls I’d had the hardest time reaching texted me that night to say she was still thinking about our lesson. I was so grateful that inspiration had come to me that was sharable, that could make a difference to someone else as well.

At the time, I put my current fiction project aside and started writing a Drops of Awesome book, that I soon abandoned. Maybe it was just inspiration for me and Young Woman X, I thought, and I was totally cool with that. But then I wrote up a short version of my thoughts in this post. It has since been shared and reposted by everyone and his mama and I’m filled with gratitude and awe. I am not alone! WE ARE NOT ALONE. And not just in a God Loves You kind of way, but also in a Shared Human Experience kind of way which seems very immediate and tender.

All that being said, since originally posting my Drops of Awesome thoughts before Christmas, and seeing how they’ve been received, I’ve been scared to post anything else.

You see? This has never really been a religious blog, not at DaringYoungMom.com or for the years I blogged at Parenting. I am religious and it sort of oozes out sometimes, but mostly I write about silly stuff. I blog about life in all its weirdness. My next post will likely be about yogurt or photo-bombing my son’s school pictures.

You might have to wait a long time for inspiration lightning to strike again. I hope it does. If it does, I will totally share it with you. If not, read back through the comments on the Drops of Awesome post, because they are… well… awesome. In the meantime, read about my yogurt and tell me about yours and we will drip away together toward something magical.

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21 Responses to Drops of Thank You

  1. Jenn says:

    I have been a long time reader of your blog and I have always found your blog to be uplifting even if it wasn’t spiritual per say. I think the new readers will feel right at home with your usual fare. But I do have to say I feel all sorts of awesome because your drops of awesome post is almost exactly what I told all if my friends right after the tragedy at Newton and then to read your post which mirrored my thoughts so perfectly and then hear how well it has been received by people warms my heart. I was worried as I told people that the answer to this tragedy was not the knee jerk reaction of “I am homeschooling now” but the very opposite, that out schools need our children and their goodness more than ever, that I was going to offend people. But you said it in the perfect way. My husband is a survivor of Columbine (was in the library etc) and he feels the same way that I do, even though he if all people might have reason to react in fear (we have a kindergartner), but we stand firm in knowing that we can teach our child to be the good in the world and to love others. Sorry for the long comment :)

  2. Tay says:

    Also a long-time reader/blurker. I want you to know that not only is Drops of Awesome on my top 5 most beautiful Atonement lesson list, but it was so perfect. The visual of the end, where it feels like we are never enough and we’ll never fill up the jar and then with Christ it’s not only filled, but overflowing? Tears man. It was so beautiful. I shared with my husband, my friends, facebook, and I want to incorporate it into an RS lesson sometime. Everyone should see this visual.

    And just so you know, your experience with postpartum anxiety/depression absolutely saved me. I didn’t know what was wrong with me, that it could be addressed and tamed and that it’s OKAY to take some meds to get through it all while learning with therapy how to cope with life again. A million thank-yous. I love and look forward to all of your posts, and have done for about 4 years now.

  3. Melanie says:

    Jeanie and I have consistently read every one of your posts since the flamingo post, reading it has been something we bond over and love doing. I think even if you are not out right talking about in your posts you are still sharing the love of Christ when you share your values and family love with everyone. So thank you! Thank you for always uplifting us and making us smile!

  4. I loved your Drops of Awesome post, but you know what? I love your others, too, because they are warm and funny and insightful. So keep them coming, whatever they are. Oh, and flash mobs always make me tear up, too. I thought I was the only one! I don’t even know why. Just…all those people, doing something special and fun together, and the onlookers getting involved, and celebrating. If you and I are ever in the same city, we must make our own flash mob, just for the fun of it.

  5. I think you are a bucket full of awesome and even though I have been deprived up until the drops post I love your blog and you and your perspective. You are the silver lining in the Seattle clouds.
    I am reading older posts and laughing and sharing with the family. I will have to go to Carnation, WA one day with a basketball ;)

  6. Janelle says:

    I found your blog because of drops of awesome. I love it. But as I have gone back and read some of your blog, I have loved it. You are a true writer. You can but words to the feelings we all have as young moms. I have laughed so hard on some of your posts because I can relate. That is why I love your blog, because I don’t know how to use words to describe my feelings or experiences in a good way. You do it spectacularly. Please keep it up knowing that we are all on the same boat and that is why we love your blog.

  7. Kay says:

    I just found this blog through my friend on Facebook linking to “Drops of Awesome” and while I love it, I love your funny posts just as much. So, yes, please, talk about yogurt. Or tantrums. Or anything, just keep writing. And I’m LDS and a young mother (two kids-ages 2 1/2 and almost 1) in Maple Valley, so hi neighbor! Enjoy the sun while it lasts!

  8. Jackie says:

    Oh my gosh. I am being a good mom. My kids are happy, and they love me. Awesome.

  9. Jackie says:

    I hope one of the General Authorities reads this and you get to read this over the pulpit next conference.

  10. Connie B says:

    Loved the ‘drops of awesome’ and I’m a new reader of your blog but I find your posts to be fun and real. Keep going!

  11. Cynthia Valentine says:

    I love you!

  12. Michelle says:

    I’m a new reader to your blog and found you because of “Drops of Awesome”. I have since shared it with lots of friends. I’m a business and life coach, and as someone who coaches lots of experts and authors, I think “Drops of Awesome” would be and AMAZING book. I would love to see it out in the world for all to see. You are a gifted writer.

  13. Stacy Malone says:

    Do it! Publish it, self or otherwise. I need a book pick for book club!

  14. I just found your blog today because of 2 sisters in my ward who shared your Drops of Awesome post on FB last night. It came to me at the perfect time and echoes things I’ve been feeling the past week or so. I might even write a blog post sharing my feelings. No matter what your blog is normally about, it’s awesome that you wrote about the inspiration of Drops of Awesome and how that inspiration helped you and your YW – especially because now it can help others too. Thanks so much for taking the time to share it!!

  15. Erin Marie says:

    I’ve been having a ROUGH time with my perception of my parenting. And I just realized today that I’ve had your Drops of Awesome in the back of my mind, without really knowing it was there. It reinforces the little things that I do right, and it’s turned my attitude around, and I’m doing much better, both at being a mom and loving myself.

    Thank you.

  16. Shard says:

    Thanks for the courage to post you’re thoughts on Drops– both the Awesome, and the Thanks. Be comforted- no one expects that level of intense inspiration all the time, in fact it makes us feel more connected to know that it is not an everyday thing for you, any more than for us. It’s nice to know your willing to just be yourself. :)

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  18. Heffalump says:

    I have been reading your blog for years and years. For some reason, my feed stopped updating and I didn’t realize it so I have only caught the posts you linked to on Facebook. I came over today to find the drops of awesome post again and figured out that I have been missing some of your posts, so here I am.
    You and I already chatted about your drops of awesome post, and you know how wonderful I think it is. But I love the quirky, the funny and yes, the weird. A lot of blogs that I read have gone by the wayside over the years, at least as far as my reading them goes, but I have been a pretty consistent fan of yours all this time. I think it comes down to one thing that I love about your blog. Real. You have a wide spectrum of real here. From beautiful spiritual experiences to heart wrenching to shoot milk out your nose hilarious. Just keep being you Kathryn. You are awesome in myriad ways.

  19. Cat says:

    I loved drops of awesome. I can relate so well to what you wrote…almost as if you were saying my own thoughts. Thanks for sharing. This motivates me to have a positive outlook & to focus on getting more drops of awesome, rather than looking at what I do wrong all the time. This is especially great for women, since we tend to feel so much guilt. Thanks again for sharing.

  20. Becca says:

    I just heard about your blog from our lesson last week in Relief Society. The teacher had come across your blog and shared your Drops of Awesome post and all its wonderful, relatable-ness! There were many laughs, head nods, and understanding as she read about your self -talk. While she was teaching I was already googling drops of awesome on my iPhone. :)

    Then she had us go around and shout out our various drops of awesome. Mine was, “I snuggled with my 6yr old son when he asked me to! (instead of blowing him off for other responsibilities).” She talked about the drops and how even though we listed so many things, we had a long a way to go with that bowl filling up. She pulled out that jug of water, labeled “ATONEMENT” and the gasp and shock and warmth was audible. Everyone felt that powerful impact, without her even saying anything. The image of her filling up that bowl full of awesome with the Atonement will hopefully stay in my mind forever.

    I shared the lesson with my sister who lives far away and intend to share it with my other sister as well. Thanks for deciding to share your inspiration with the blogging world-its a powerful community! And I think its totally ok to write about yogurt and pictures too. I will hang around and read and enjoy regardless of your content, because it feels wonderful here. :)

    Happy Writing!

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